Life, Love and tradegy....

ok well like last weekend me and zach workman were hanging out all nite at tony's party and we kinda sorta made out...... :) lol but uhhh and now me and him are goin to the movies tonite... its gonna be awesome and tori's all pissed becuz she thinks he likes her and i guess he dont. but idk... i hope me and him can get together becuz whenever im around him, im juss so happy and i cant help it, its just that im so happy and he treats me so good and i feel like a queen lol... that sounded realyl corny.. but who cares... im so confused rite now.. idk how he really feels about me but iunno i dont want n e of my friends talkin to him for me becuz i wanna find out for myself u kno? well i g2g lexie should be here n e second to give us a ride but uhh peace ez

ok tori is tryin to say ive been talkin about her but the only thing i talked to jerr berr about was him havin a bonfire and his movie for english... its crap! uhhhh i gotta track meet tomorrow which is gonna suck becuz we gotta get up early... then after that i gotta go to my knee dr. and see whats new wit it.... ummm idk tho i hope it aint bad news cuz idk i dont want it to be but uhhh theres so much drama between my friends and stuff but uhh i gotta shower now cuz i gotta get up early lol ttul!

peace ez

Okay we had a feild trip to cereal city and while we were there a whole bunch of ppl stole... and i got accused of it too. adn none of my friends believe me and its stupid they should kno i wouldnt lie to them about it. but they think megan is a bad influence on me and this is wat i think. i love hangin out with megan and juss cuz she may do some stupid stuff doesnt mean im goin to. i think the ppl that are saying she is should be able to trust me that i kno rite from wrong and can make my own decisions.... they are starting to bother me about it. shes my friend and juss cuz u dont like her dont mean i cant hang out with her. its my prob. im not gonna turn into a bad kid juss cuz of one of my friends and it really hurts me that they would think that. i cant believe that they dont trust me. ummm..... well idk it juss really hurts forreal! im serious and i dont kno what to do about it... well uhhh thats about all the time i have to write, so uhhh

i luve u ron and kenz but u guys need to be able to trust me to make my own decisions! ly both ls

peace ez

Okay im really gettin sick of backstabbing bitches and fucking whores who call themselves my best friends.... im sick of all the guys thinking of me as juss a friend but then when one guy comes along that i like and he lieks me... my so called friends have to go and be bitches and ruin it all for me.. it really pisses me off that i can never be as pretty as any of them or as rich or w.t.f ever u wanna say. i juss will never be as good as n e of them. i swear i wish sometimes that i could look even somewhat like one of my friends cuz they are all pretty. but i cant help the way i look and i wish that for once, a guy would look past that and see the real me. i mean that sounds corny and all but idc n e more im sick of all the bullshit. im tryin not to take it out on n e one but i cant help it... im in a pissy mood all the time becuz im constantly tryin to be somethin im not... like tryin to fit in i mean i try not to care what ppl think of me but it gets a lil old when all the guys u like only talk about kenzie and ronni.... i mean dont get me wrong... they are gorgous and i luv them to death but sumtimes i wish that i could be better than even juss one of them becuz it gets so old, so fast...

Also, ive been having anxiety attacks lately becuz ive been so depressed and stressed and everything and it really sucks... i can never sleep and ive lost my appetite, believe it or not today all i ate was a salad, a ice cream from skool, and a cupple devil squares. then i had a mt dew and a flavored water... its so weird... im juss never hungry n e more????? idk!

on top of all that, i got 15 dollaz stolen today so ya im deff in an even worse mood so idk what to say other than if i take ne thing out on ne of u, im sorry its juss how im gonna be from now on becuz its not like im ever gonna get n e prettier or better at sports or richer or n e thing... i kno how my life is gonna end up.. im gonna end up juss like my fuckin mom but theres one difference, im not gonna put kids thru the shit ive been through.......

peace ez... im thinkin bout a whole buncha shit

Well today was kinda gay really cuz all i did today was track then i went to the ms track meet to help out and mr roggie didnt even need my help so i juss sat and watched. umm we have a track meet tomorrow and its gonna be retarted becuz im not gonna be able to clear pole vault... the only good thing about track is uhhh hanging out with muh friends. Ummm im so confused about gloria becuz shes mad at me for something i didnt even do. everyone is tellin her me and brock go out but we dont we juss hang out with his friends.... and shes mad at me even tho she doesnt tell me that she is but she says behind my back that she is but w.e ummm easter was gay cuz no one was at my family party to talk to i was all alone lol but uhhh my mom and i finally finished progie things. it seems lately that im always in a bad mood and i feel like i take it out on muh friends and im sry but im juss not in a good mood adn im sry for all the ppl reading this that i take it out on but i cant help it. so if i ever flip out on u for no reason juss try to ignore it and i kno it sucks but uhhh idk.... no clue what else to talk about so.... i mite write soon lol.....

peace ez

ummm im goin to rocknbowl later and so it will be fun... i juss found out that the guy i mite hook up with is the same guy that one of my friends likes... and i really dont know what to do. i mean she is awesome and this kind of stuff always happens to her. as soon as she likes a guy, one of her friends goes out with him and i dont wanna be one of those ppl but me and him are goin to rocknbowl tonite and umm hopefully i can talk things out with her. me and him aint gonna go out rite away or nuttin but uhhh ya were deff talkin bout it and all and talkin about how much we liek eachother...

SOMEONE COMMENT AND GIVE ME ADVICE..... CUZ I NEED HELP!

peace ez

well brock wasnt at skool today and i deff hung out with him last nite withou gloria knowing. and she still thinks im tryin to go out with him an i deff aint tryin to get with him. i mean if it happen it happens but if it dont it dont. im not about to break him and gloria up. but uhhh ronni thinks were using her and i dont get y she thinks that but its kinda a slap in the face u kno? but w.e ummm brok i having a bon fire tonite and im prolly goin instead of the movies cuz a lotta ppl arnt goin to the movies n e more but uhhh i dont got n e thing else to say so w.e

peace ez

oh and kayla is mad at me and kenzie for tryin to get with ryan but thats bull becuz im not tryin to get with him at all.. so she can get over it he dont want her no matter what she thinks and i luv her and all but its gettin old the whole jealous thing u kno? butt i gotta go feed my new hamster ttul

well me and brock have been hangin out a lot lately and he told me he liked me. but he has a gf so i wrote him a ntoe saying that he needs to decide who he would be happiest with and who he has the most fun with and who he can see himself being with. well gloria found out and now she like hates me and i feel really super bad.... but uhh ill write a lil later i g2g to my track meet! peace ez

Well this guy named Ryan is pretty cool... hes sarah smiths brother... i mean i aint tryin to get with him but hes cool to hang out with. well he told kenzie the otha nite that he didnt like kayla at all and then today shes tellin me that they are goin out... wow im confused like no other lol but uhhh me and kenzie are gettin back to normal kinda i actually have been hangin out with her a lot. i kinda think that huge fite did us good becuz without it we would be juss bottling up things that we need to say to eachother u kno? ummm me kenzie ronni and megan stoddard broke a record in a track meet today. we broke the 400 meter relay record it was pretty sweet but uhhh ya our team won. Ryan wants me to call him tonite so i mite write later about what me and him talk about on the phone... peace ez

yesterday was sooo awesome... i got 2 11th graders numbers at rocknbowl... one of them is really hott! but umm kenzie is back which is so awesome cuz i missed her like no other! lol but n e whoo.... aint much else to talk about so peace ez